Comics Amazing Spider-Man #559 spoilers. I'll read it so you don't have to

[Miken Ayers]

SPOILERS!




































































Before I start my rant let me point out this issue helps my theory that they're shifting stories out of their intended order to accomodate last minute changes that are being announced. Remember in the arc before last where the creepy Mayans covered the city in snow, then in the next issue the snow melted? Well it's back and it's also referenced as being the snow from that same storm.

So, there's a new villain introduced that robs some bank, and Spider-Man can't catch her despite her having no super powers since she practices Parkour, or urban gymnastics. I know exactly what they're talking about here but Spider-Man can run faster than a normal human (anywhere from 50-70 mph) AND not only his abilities are on an unnatural level he should've caught her no problem. So he get's close enough to nail her with a spider tracer (Enough with the spider tracers and malfunctioning webshooters already.) So she sees the webshooter, cries to the cops, and turns herself in because she doesn't wanna be murdered.

Did I mention she also had a bunch of guys with webcams film her, so she could commit crimes and have them simultaneously stream on the internet?

So Peter get's his camera back, tries to sell the pictures to the DB, and Dexter won't buy them since everyone has cameras on their phones or carries digital cameras making the whole Spider-Man photographer angle dated. It's been dated for years, but Marvel made him go back to that. Probably just so they could tell this crap story. He then offers Peter two million dollars to do some paparazzi shots and then Joe Robertson questions Peter's integrity if he goes down this path. Bennett also offers this to Peter, because of the photos he can get from views no one else can capture, because he knows he's Spider-Man. Actually he didn't say that he referred to Peter as some sort of photographic ninja.

We get a scene of Jonah doing tai chi, and then he flips out seeing a DB billboard. Two cops come up to him trying to calm him down, and one just happens to be the cop that hate's Spider-Man that Peter might move in with. Another stupid subplot that's been done before where get's close with someone that happens to hate Spider-Man.

Next Peter goes to the club where some heart throb *****ebag celebrity is. It's referenced as being the club from the first BND issue. We see some chick made out of paper meanwhile Peter's walks past her to the rafters (she's blended in the wall, but the spider sense should've warned him about this) of some VIP section trying to get pictures of the guy doing something celebritylike. The guy get's sassy with a waitress that asks for his autograph,

Peter get's pictures and then they start chasing him. He get's in to the club section of the building and the spider sense is forgotten yet again by Dan Slott as Peter get's stonewalled by a bouncer. Harry and Lily see him ask if he's ok, then Harry immediately pretends he doesn't know Peter as bouncers drag him out and stomp his camera. Luckily his memory card is undamaged, but we know he's not getting two million dollars so who gives a crap? Then we see the Paper Doll chick with a room decorated in newspaper photos stroking that same celebrity's photo. I'm willing to bet she's not infatuated with photos so much as the photographer. I guess if this is the case Dan Slott saw Clueless recently.

So there's more crap puns, thinly veiled nostalgic throwbacks, and two new crap villains no one could give a crap about. And the sales continue to drop.

 

[kguillou]

Orginally posted by Miken Ayers

Harry and Lily see him ask if he's ok, then Harry immediately pretends he doesn't know Peter as bouncers drag him out and stomp his camera. Luckily his memory card is undamaged, but we know he's not getting two million dollars so who gives a crap? Then we see the Paper Doll chick with a room decorated in newspaper photos stroking that same celebrity's photo. I'm willing to bet she's not infatuated with photos so much as the photographer. I guess if this is the case Dan Slott saw Clueless recently.

Aww man, so Harry's back to his old selfish ways again? I thought we were done with those days? Man, they're trying way too much to tie this into the spectacular cartoon.

 

[Miken Ayers]

Aww man, so Harry's back to his old selfish ways again? I thought we were done with those days? Man, they're trying way too much to tie this into the spectacular cartoon.

I thought we were done with the days of Harry being alive. One ressurected Osborn is enough.

 

[ragingdemon155]

I thought we were done with the days of Harry being alive. One ressurected Osborn is enough.

Heh True True.

I'm skimming through the issues at the store so I'm not really in deep with the story. Is Harry actually serving a purpose in the series? I mean, from what I'm seeing....there's still no point to bringing him back.

 

[Miken Ayers]

Heh True True.

I'm skimming through the issues at the store so I'm not really in deep with the story. Is Harry actually serving a purpose in the series? I mean, from what I'm seeing....there's still no point to bringing him back.

I think he's only really there to be a red herring to this new Goblin named Menace.

 

[farmernudie]

All I'll say is this......It annoys me tremendously that Spidey can chase the likes of Firelord (galactic level villian) around a city and yet he can't seem to catch a normal human being who knows some basic gymnastics.

It irks me to no level when they under-write him as some middle-aged ninkompoop of a hero who is inept at super-heroing like some third tier wanna-be.

I am even more annoyed that I can't enjoy my favorite hero for the first time in history, because he doesn't feel like the same guy at all. Nuff said.

 

[Kirk Langstrom]

SPOILERS!


































































Before I start my rant let me point out this issue helps my theory that they're shifting stories out of their intended order to accomodate last minute changes that are being announced. Remember in the arc before last where the creepy Mayans covered the city in snow, then in the next issue the snow melted? Well it's back and it's also referenced as being the snow from that same storm.

So, there's a new villain introduced that robs some bank, and Spider-Man can't catch her despite her having no super powers since she practices Parkour, or urban gymnastics. I know exactly what they're talking about here but Spider-Man can run faster than a normal human (anywhere from 50-70 mph) AND not only his abilities are on an unnatural level he should've caught her no problem. So he get's close enough to nail her with a spider tracer (Enough with the spider tracers and malfunctioning webshooters already.) So she sees the webshooter, cries to the cops, and turns herself in because she doesn't wanna be murdered.

Did I mention she also had a bunch of guys with webcams film her, so she could commit crimes and have them simultaneously stream on the internet?

So Peter get's his camera back, tries to sell the pictures to the DB, and Dexter won't buy them since everyone has cameras on their phones or carries digital cameras making the whole Spider-Man photographer angle dated. It's been dated for years, but Marvel made him go back to that. Probably just so they could tell this crap story. He then offers Peter two million dollars to do some paparazzi shots and then Joe Robertson questions Peter's integrity if he goes down this path. Bennett also offers this to Peter, because of the photos he can get from views no one else can capture, because he knows he's Spider-Man. Actually he didn't say that he referred to Peter as some sort of photographic ninja.

We get a scene of Jonah doing tai chi, and then he flips out seeing a DB billboard. Two cops come up to him trying to calm him down, and one just happens to be the cop that hate's Spider-Man that Peter might move in with. Another stupid subplot that's been done before where get's close with someone that happens to hate Spider-Man.

Next Peter goes to the club where some heart throb *****ebag celebrity is. It's referenced as being the club from the first BND issue. We see some chick made out of paper meanwhile Peter's walks past her to the rafters (she's blended in the wall, but the spider sense should've warned him about this) of some VIP section trying to get pictures of the guy doing something celebritylike. The guy get's sassy with a waitress that asks for his autograph,

Peter get's pictures and then they start chasing him. He get's in to the club section of the building and the spider sense is forgotten yet again by Dan Slott as Peter get's stonewalled by a bouncer. Harry and Lily see him ask if he's ok, then Harry immediately pretends he doesn't know Peter as bouncers drag him out and stomp his camera. Luckily his memory card is undamaged, but we know he's not getting two million dollars so who gives a crap? Then we see the Paper Doll chick with a room decorated in newspaper photos stroking that same celebrity's photo. I'm willing to bet she's not infatuated with photos so much as the photographer. I guess if this is the case Dan Slott saw Clueless recently.

So there's more crap puns, thinly veiled nostalgic throwbacks, and two new crap villains no one could give a crap about. And the sales continue to drop.

A gymnast and a paper doll girl? Are you kidding me?

Somewhere, The Sinister Six are sitting around and laughing their asses off. t:

 

[Miken Ayers]

All I'll say is this......It annoys me tremendously that Spidey can chase the likes of Firelord (galactic level villian) around a city and yet he can't seem to catch a normal human being who knows some basic gymnastics.

It irks me to no level when they under-write him as some middle-aged ninkompoop of a hero who is inept at super-heroing like some third tier wanna-be.

I am even more annoyed that I can't enjoy my favorite hero for the first time in history, because he doesn't feel like the same guy at all. Nuff said.

But Joe Quesada's happy. Isn't that all that matters?

 

[Themanofbat]

All I can say about the glaring mistake (and subsequent rant) on the last issue's review, all I can tell everybody is to read the issue tourself and make up your own impression rather than listening to the obvious bias of someone who still reads something they clearly do not enjoy.

 

[Miken Ayers]

All I can say about the glaring mistake (and subsequent rant) on the last issue's review, all I can tell everybody is to read the issue tourself and make up your own impression rather than listening to the obvious bias of someone who still reads something they clearly do not enjoy.

I do have a bias, but I'm not making anything up. At least you're not saying this time around how you can't wait for this issue. It'll make quite a notch in my sword if I convert you.

 

[imdaly]

I can't wait for this issue.

 

[kguillou]

Well was the artwork at least good Miken Ayers?

 

[Miken Ayers]

Well was the artwork at least good Miken Ayers?

In my opinion it's the best art since we got Brand New Day. However pretty pictures mean crap if the story sucks.

 

[Themanofbat]

I do have a bias, but I'm not making anything up. At least you're not saying this time around how you can't wait for this issue. It'll make quite a notch in my sword if I convert you.

I can't wait for this issue... that goes without saying.

For the first time since Roger Stern wrote this book, I'm looking forward to each and every next issue.

 

[Miken Ayers]

I can't wait for this issue... that goes without saying.

For the first time since Roger Stern wrote this book, I'm looking forward to each and every next issue.

I don't believe you.

 

[iloveclones]

I don't have to wait. I have it.

It was good. Marcos Martin is definately an artist that I'd love to see on a full time basis. He doesn't do anything splashy, but lays out a comic like they're supposed to be. JJJ once again has the best moment. And I like the idea of[BLACKOUT] PP getting tempted by the taste of papparrazzi (sp?) money. [/BLACKOUT]

Miken, I know that you have an agenda here, but at least play fair. SHH gives you the tools for spoilers. You can use blackout or spoiler tags. If you don't know how to use them, PM me or any of the mods and we'd be glad to give you a hand.

 

[Themanofbat]

I can't wait for this issue... that goes without saying.

For the first time since Roger Stern wrote this book, I'm looking forward to each and every next issue.

I don't believe you.

Don't... I couldn't care less.

 

[Brand]

Don't... I could care less.

I've always wondered about how that phrase is used. Shouldn't it be, "I couldn't care less," since you mean to say that what he thinks means nothing to you? Saying, "I could care less," technically implies that his opinion carries some weight with you.

Sorry to disrupt the conversation, but that's a phrase I hear all the time and I always wonder about it--either it's being misused or I'm just crazy and thinking about it the wrong way.

 

[Miken Ayers]

I've always wondered about how that phrase is used. Shouldn't it be, "I couldn't care less," since you mean to say that what he thinks means nothing to you? Saying, "I could care less," technically implies that his opinion carries some weight with you.

Sorry to disrupt the conversation, but that's a phrase I hear all the time and I always wonder about it--either it's being misused or I'm just crazy and thinking about it the wrong way.

Maybe it's saying you can care less than not caring. Like caring in the negatives to emphasize your lack of care.

 

[iloveclones]

It's always funny when I see this thread posted, and I'll tell you why:

As many of you know, I get this title early through my sub. At first, as an attempt to drum up a little interest ahead of time, I posted this thread and a review (Mine suck anyways. Even Miken’s biased/cynical review is better). But what I started noticing, was that no one posted in it. Mostly because (I think), if you haven't read it yourself, there's really nothing to talk about. And some people don't like to be spoiled. You've sort of solved this problem for me. Because people DO like to *****. So day after day, the casual non-reader is seeing this thread get bumped up to the top of the list. Even if they don’t come into the thread, they know something noteworthy is going on (even when it isn’t) Now, I have no illusions that I’m going to convince anyone dead set against these changes that BND is good. But new readers? Ones that are just curious as to what all the fuss is about, they always come around. And viola, my dilemma has been solved for me.

 

[Themanofbat]

I've always wondered about how that phrase is used. Shouldn't it be, "I couldn't care less," since you mean to say that what he thinks means nothing to you? Saying, "I could care less," technically implies that his opinion carries some weight with you.

Sorry to disrupt the conversation, but that's a phrase I hear all the time and I always wonder about it--either it's being misused or I'm just crazy and thinking about it the wrong way.

You're right... though English is not my first language...

 

[Miken Ayers]

It's always funny when I see this thread posted, and I'll tell you why:

As many of you know, I get this title early through my sub. At first, as an attempt to drum up a little interest ahead of time, I posted this thread and a review (Mine suck anyways. Even Miken’s biased/cynical review is better). But what I started noticing, was that no one posted in it. Mostly because (I think), if you haven't read it yourself, there's really nothing to talk about. And some people don't like to be spoiled. You've sort of solved this problem for me. Because people DO like to *****. So day after day, the casual non-reader is seeing this thread get bumped up to the top of the list. Even if they don’t come into the thread, they know something noteworthy is going on (even when it isn’t) Now, I have no illusions that I’m going to convince anyone dead set against these changes that BND is good. But new readers? Ones that are just curious as to what all the fuss is about, they always come around. And viola, my dilemma has been solved for me.

Also a few people said they won't buy it after reading my review. Once the book stops sucking I'll give more favorable reviews...IF I mean.

 

[Brand]

You're right... though English is not my first language...

Don't worry. It's a common phrase that I hear all the time (from people who speak English only, no less), so it's not like you're the only person to use that exact phrase. I honestly have no idea how it became so widespread.

I blame television.

It's always funny when I see this thread posted, and I'll tell you why:

As many of you know, I get this title early through my sub. At first, as an attempt to drum up a little interest ahead of time, I posted this thread and a review (Mine suck anyways. Even Miken’s biased/cynical review is better). But what I started noticing, was that no one posted in it. Mostly because (I think), if you haven't read it yourself, there's really nothing to talk about. And some people don't like to be spoiled. You've sort of solved this problem for me. Because people DO like to *****. So day after day, the casual non-reader is seeing this thread get bumped up to the top of the list. Even if they don’t come into the thread, they know something noteworthy is going on (even when it isn’t) Now, I have no illusions that I’m going to convince anyone dead set against these changes that BND is good. But new readers? Ones that are just curious as to what all the fuss is about, they always come around. And viola, my dilemma has been solved for me.

For the most part, I've found that people like detailed, spoilery summaries of their issues. The biggest forum that I visit--the CBR X-Boards--has long, detailed descriptions of every issue that comes out. The level of description varies depending on the poster, but each one is packed with spoilers, much like this thread. Scans are also frequently included.

For my part, it's nice to get a full blow-by-blow so that I can better judge how good the title is at the moment. I'd like to see things be reversed (though I know they won't), so it's nice to be able to look for any signs of hope. I'm guessing my interest will wane when the romantic subplots are brought to the forefront. I checked out the Spectacular SM cartoon to see how good it is, and my biggest problem with it is the thing I fear to be coming the most--Peter having to duck out on his friends/date all the time and be Spider-Man. It's a good cartoon, but it gets old. Fast.

 

[moraldeficiency]

For the most part, I've found that people like detailed, spoilery summaries of their issues. The biggest forum that I visit--the CBR X-Boards--has long, detailed descriptions of every issue that comes out. The level of description varies depending on the poster, but each one is packed with spoilers, much like this thread. Scans are also frequently included.

For my part, it's nice to get a full blow-by-blow so that I can better judge how good the title is at the moment. I'd like to see things be reversed (though I know they won't), so it's nice to be able to look for any signs of hope. I'm guessing my interest will wane when the romantic subplots are brought to the forefront. I checked out the Spectacular SM cartoon to see how good it is, and my biggest problem with it is the thing I fear to be coming the most--Peter having to duck out on his friends/date all the time and be Spider-Man. It's a good cartoon, but it gets old. Fast.

Gotta agree the level of detail makes for a lot of the summary. But it also helps that Miken is biased and he's got a lot of people that think like him on the issue. I can't believe that chick is just an urban gymnist. That kinda sucks as Pete is the supreme urban gymnist and should have no trouble schooling her if that's all she's got.


Now about the cartoon. I haven't seen more than three episodes cause I generally have to work but the one's I have seen are pretty much the best Spider-Man cartoons I've ever seen. The level of detail and thought put into the story is just amazing.


Oh, clones, you've got a good point about spoilers and normally I would agree but if you've got the term spoilers in the title you're clicking and reading at your own risk. I think spoiler tags are only necessary in boards that aren't pretty much about spoilers. I never got using them on the bought and thought threads either cause they're intentionally about spoiling and reviewing an issue. Still maybe I'm just crazy on this.

 

[iloveclones]

Well, all I was saying is that there are tools provided. What's the harm in using them. (Honestly, blackouts are so alluring, that you probably get more people to peek if you use them. I'm like an addict where they're concerned.)

Miken, as far as you getting people to drop based on your reviews, well, I'm highly doubtful. More likely, they're just giving you some props on something they were going to do anyway. I've picked up TONS of books based on people's recommendations, but have never once dropped one because of it. I mean, that's ******ed. I'll concede that people are buying good stuff that I'm overlooking, but I think I can evaluate them on my own, once I'm pointed in the direction.