What to do. How to escape?

[Flash525]

Feels like I'm stuck in a dead end.

I've been in my current employment for what seems like forever, though it's only actually been eleven or twelve years, and within three different departments. I left school with mediocre grades, bettered some of those in College afterwards, and undertook a Computing course (cause at the time, that's all I was ever interested in, which is no longer the case).

I've looked at online courses, though I'm unsure about the investment (I just don't know whether I'd have the mentality to stick at an online course for 12 months or three years). If such a course were ever undertaken, that's still not an immediate release (which is what I'm after here).

The job isn't hard, it's easy, and boring. I need something that's going to challenge myself and keep me occupied, both mentally and physically. I don't want an office job if I can help it.

I'm currently earning an annual pay of £27,000 (£34,000) which isn't too bad; I'm making some savings, though I haven't got an extravagant lifestyle and my social life is quite a simple one.

Looking around though (to escape this place) all I'm seeing is a range of other jobs from Factory Work, Catering, Retail (etc) with pays ranging from £16,000 to £19,000 ($20,000 - $24,000) and that's simply not remotely practical for me. I work shifts too, and a good portion of my wages £6,000) is from that shift pay, so even if I were to request to resign my shift position, I'd be at a £6,000 loss.

I'm not depressed, though I do have down days (or occasionally, down weeks); the result of a mind numbing job and a rather dull (if I'm being honest) social circle. I need a new profession and I need to meet more people, though it just seems impossible.

I've looked at social groups or activity groups, those that seems worth the time are seemingly too far away for casual travel or they're all on evenings which (because of my shift work) complicate matters.

Anyone else in a similar position, or has anyone else managed to escape the position?

 

[Willi Berg]

I don't have much advice on the home/job front but I will say that something that really helped me was overseas volunteer work. Working overseas gives the trip a sense of purpose and you really do meet more of the locals in a different setting. Also, backpacking. It's a very open and social kind of travel. I've done conservation work overseas, and there are other volunteer jobs in teaching, construction, working with animals, working in a resort etc. If overseas jobs are too expensive (or saving up can be a goal), then there are local opportunities too. It can also give you an idea of what type of work you like doing.

I know that you are probably bound by work schedules but if you have the opportunity or are able to take some time off to do it, then its worth it. Even if it is local stuff.

 

[Flash525]

I don't have much advice on the home/job front but I will say that something that really helped me was overseas volunteer work. Working overseas gives the trip a sense of purpose and you really do meet more of the locals in a different setting. Also, backpacking. It's a very open and social kind of travel. I've done conservation work overseas, and there are other volunteer jobs in teaching, construction, working with animals, working in a resort etc. If overseas jobs are too expensive (or saving up can be a goal), then there are local opportunities too. It can also give you an idea of what type of work you like doing.

I know that you are probably bound by work schedules but if you have the opportunity or are able to take some time off to do it, then its worth it. Even if it is local stuff.

As much as I'd love the adventure, it isn't practical at the moment; I have employment schedules to worry about in addition to a mortgage, so I couldn't just quit work and go traveling for a few months. I'd obviously need somewhere to come back too, and my savings wouldn't cover that.

Still, not to say I couldn't get two two-week holidays (of backpacking/volunteer holidays) in a year. We're gifted with 25 days annual leave (usually 22 after they've taken the Christmas Week days away from us). Certainly something I should look into!

 

[Willi Berg]

Basically, there aren't easy answers or easy solutions. I guess if it's something you really want- be it travel, study, socialising- then it's something you have to commit to or go out of your way to do or figure out. And it won't necessarily happen or change quickly, or always work out. But I think a lot of people feel the same way.

 

[Mandon Knight]

I think part of the 'issue' or 'view' these days generally is that the 'freedom to travel' or escape is a MUST on everyone's agenda or plan. It's not. Travel is not just something available to all. I appreciate society / advertising will encourage us to do that but as Flash is saying, it's not just a question of 'getting up and escaping', life does not always allow that.

It's particularly a 'gap year' culture which has expanded into a 20-30 something thinking, my perspective is that 'we' as society are allowing ourselves to 'stay as teenage-young people' thinkers for longer than we should be. That's not a point aimed at anyone in this thread, there are genuine requirements of thinking/re-structuring here.

The art or act of re-structure or re-plotting one's one line of approach was put very eloquently by my therapist recently....

'A tree planted thousands of years ago with all it's established roots is then cut down and allowed to go again, will that tree grow exactly the same way ? NO. Will it be the same tree that grows ? YES in it's soul, but it's journey will differ from the first. It's options will be different'.

Sadly, it depends on how many options are available to us to allow us to consider then implement the changes. That's the governing 'yardstick'.

 

[Sundancer]

significant other? Friends to hang out with?

 

[Willi Berg]

I think part of the 'issue' or 'view' these days generally is that the 'freedom to travel' or escape is a MUST on everyone's agenda or plan. It's not. Travel is not just something available to all. I appreciate society / advertising will encourage us to do that but as Flash is saying, it's not just a question of 'getting up and escaping', life does not always allow that.

It's particularly a 'gap year' culture which has expanded into a 20-30 something thinking, my perspective is that 'we' as society are allowing ourselves to 'stay as teenage-young people' thinkers for longer than we should be. That's not a point aimed at anyone in this thread, there are genuine requirements of thinking/re-structuring here.

The art or act of re-structure or re-plotting one's one line of approach was put very eloquently by my therapist recently....

'A tree planted thousands of years ago with all it's established roots is then cut down and allowed to go again, will that tree grow exactly the same way ? NO. Will it be the same tree that grows ? YES in it's soul, but it's journey will differ from the first. It's options will be different'.

Sadly, it depends on how many options are available to us to allow us to consider then implement the changes. That's the governing 'yardstick'.

There are no suggestions here of living in Ibiza as a perpetual teenager, but of broadening one's horizons and realising/reminding yourself that there is a bigger world out there. (Even locally, in your community.)

A holiday/vacation, even if it's a one-off thing or a short break, isn't a far-fetched thing.

Of course there are limitations such as money. Most everyone has them. But on the other hand, you also can't let certain obstacles immediately dissuade you from doing things that you may want to do.

 

[jmc]

A hobbie would certainly help, something that you could do for fun, but also something that could turn into something lucrative in the future.

 

[Micromind]

Learn some new Sports, and try to take part in some local sports events, apart from that short term online courses are not bad either.

 

[Flash525]

Basically, there aren't easy answers or easy solutions. I guess if it's something you really want- be it travel, study, socialising- then it's something you have to commit to or go out of your way to do or figure out. And it won't necessarily happen or change quickly, or always work out. But I think a lot of people feel the same way.

I think you're right - a lot of people do, and a lot of people don't do anything about it, rather they expect changes to happen overnight, expect things given to them, or for other people to otherwise organise them.

I think part of the 'issue' or 'view' these days generally is that the 'freedom to travel' or escape is a MUST on everyone's agenda or plan. It's not. Travel is not just something available to all. I appreciate society / advertising will encourage us to do that but as Flash is saying, it's not just a question of 'getting up and escaping', life does not always allow that.

It's particularly a 'gap year' culture which has expanded into a 20-30 something thinking, my perspective is that 'we' as society are allowing ourselves to 'stay as teenage-young people' thinkers for longer than we should be. That's not a point aimed at anyone in this thread, there are genuine requirements of thinking/re-structuring here.

It amazes me how many people do actually manage to travel and finance themselves. I know many people get temporary jobs whilst on the move, but that isn't always feasible or practical, not to say I ever particularly wanted a gap year, but I would like to see more of the world.

I think it's like anything though in the sense that what's out of the norm seems more popular than it actually is. People traveling and posting about it on social media makes it seem like everyone is doing it, when in actual fact, it's probably actually a minority.

significant other? Friends to hang out with?

I have no significant other, that ... element in my life is seemingly a no-go at the moment. I have friends, though they're frustrating to organise at times, or are otherwise content with staying in playing video games all day.

A hobbie would certainly help, something that you could do for fun, but also something that could turn into something lucrative in the future.

Learn some new Sports, and try to take part in some local sports events, apart from that short term online courses are not bad either.

I have hobbies, though learning something new, or joining a club/group is difficult because of my shift patterns. The town area that I live in doesn't seem to offer much in the way of generic social events for people in their 30's (or in general actually); I'd have to travel 30-45 minutes to the next town/city to be involved in anything, and the few social meets I've found generally don't start till around 8pm and go on till 11pm. I've usually got to be up by 4/4:30am for work. I need obviously sleep, then you factor in the travel time.

Annoyingly said meets seem to be weekdays too. Wouldn't be so bad if they did stuff on the weekends when I don't work, but then I'm usually busy with family or other activities then. It's the week that drags me down.

 

[jmc]

In terms of learning new things there are online universities you can use to further your education, and you can do the courses at your own leisure. Udemy.com is a good place to start, hundreds of courses that are pretty cheap.

 

[Mandon Knight]

I think if you are 'single', you tend to be the one to organise events with friends or have the 'dependency' upon friends more, if you have a partner or S.O., then that link or need is right with you and so your need for social interaction on a wider basis is less.