Hype League

Sub-Chapter II: Enter DarkCat

This is how it feels to be DarkCat.

You are found on the doorstep of a single, middle-aged man. He takes you in and raises you lovingly. You are treated well, and you never once thought about leaving. Yet you still feel seperate. Different.

At the age of 5 you are enrolled in a gymnastics class, where you excel. One day, you sneak onto the highest beam, 5 feet above the ground. That may not seem that much, but when you're 5, things are alot bigger than they are to an adult. You fall, but surprisngly, land on your feet. Your father picks you up, not noticing a glint of gold in your eye...

13 years later, at 18 you qualify for the Olympics, getting the silver, but that's okay with you. You know you did you your best. You fly home to Spideria City...

Walking through the streets one day, you see a gang of 5 or so picking on a 60-or-so year old woman. You run over to help her, and tell her to run. The gang turns on you, taking out switchblades. Your eyes go gold, and you leap 10 feet in the air, dodging the knife slashes. As you go to punch one of the men, you fingernails somehow become claws. You slash the face of a guy about to stab you, and kick him in the groin. You punch another in the stomach, knocking him out cold. The other three, terrified, run away. Exhilirated, you find you enjoyed the rush of the combat, and that you feel better than you have ever felt before.

Horrified, you go to your dad's house, where you tell him everything that happened. He tells you how you were found on his doorstep, but strangely you are not surprised. You tell him that to you, he is your real dad. You tell your dad about the rush of he combat, the exhiliration. He just smiles.

You decide to use your...talents...for the purpose of helping others. You train for the next year, honing your already impressive skills. Your father helps you. When the year is over, DarkCat emerges.
 
*credit goes to Alexia Dark for help with my origin to make the story less crappy
 
As always, you never fail to suprise me. Good Job!

Still, I would like to know something. How do these characters choose what path they are going to lead? You can't just have a character become a hero because they feel like it. They need a specific reason. Something that changes them for the better like Batman or Spiderman.

Cause as you know it takes just one step to lead someone in a different path. Either good or evil. When you design characters just remember this: What is going to define this person to become good or evil?
 
It all depends on the way they were raised, actually. Edge was raised and trained by a man who wants to help, but due to his old age, cannot, so he trains someone else, someone gifted, to help him. DarkCat wants to use her powers for good, again, because of the way she was raised. KnightBat wants revenge for his parents assassination. Bella's origin is complex, and one I have yet to work out
 
Swordmaster said:
It all depends on the way they were raised, actually. Edge was raised and trained by a man who wants to help, but due to his old age, cannot, so he trains someone else, someone gifted, to help him. DarkCat wants to use her powers for good, again, because of the way she was raised. KnightBat wants revenge for his parents assassination. Bella's origin is complex, and one I have yet to work out
Click to expand...

See that's what I like to hear. This is what what you need to make stand out in your origins. Some of yours were good like Edge and KnightBat. However, In DarkCat's origin it's only mentioned why she chose to be a hero. It's not enough. You need to make that specific part more definitive.

I hope I'm not being to pushy, just giving words of advice
 
I see what you're saying. Infact, it gave an idea for a new part
 
No, you were the head of an assassinataion firm.

*Don't like it?*

<F**k you>
 
I would like us to be "assassins" instead of just "snipers" sniping is a part of the job. Actually Sniping is the first thing you would learn when you become a hitman. It's the easiest and safest way to neutralize your target.
 
hitmansnipe9zn.jpg
 
Sub-Chapter III: Enter KnightBat


This is how it feels to be KnightBat.

You were found on the doorsteps of the wealthy Masters' couple, Co-CEO's of MasterTech, the companies leading manufacturer in digital technology, by the butler, Lee Amazi. You are taken in and adopted by them, and are raised well, not pampered, but not ignored. When watching television one day, you see a documentary about bats, and become fascinated by their whole lifestyle. Over the passing months, you learn anything and everything you can about bats.

For your tenth birthday, you see "The Legacy of Zorro", and are awed by the vigilante's daring acts of heroism. On the walk out of the theater, you pretend to be Zorro, swishing an imaginary blade through the air. On your way home, as you walk through a dark, dank alleyway, two shots break the soundless night. When you turn to your parents, you see their dead bodies, soaked in blood...

The police conclude that the murder was commited by corporate assassins, and they take in two suspects. You, however, know that their capture will not prevent what happened to him from happening to anyone else. On your fathers jacket, you vow to fight injustice, and remember what you have learned about bats, and the vigilante activities of Zorro...

When you reach 14 years of age you travel abroad, across many countries, learning skills. The way of the hunt, the abiltiy to fight, and the ability to make your mind as effective a weapon as a fist. This happens for five years.

At 19, you return back to Batham, a part of Hype City. You realize now how corrupt and crime-ridden the city is, and begin to devolop plans.

With Lee's help, you create a fortress in the abandoned Subway Systems underth the Masters Mansion, and create a dark persona, one who many say is the devil himself...Cloaked in black, penetrating eyes, and ears like a bat.

You have become...the KnightBat.
 
Eh... why the hell not.

Could you at least mention me a few times? Jes' wonderin'...
 
Dark Phantom said:
See that's what I like to hear. This is what what you need to make stand out in your origins. Some of yours were good like Edge and KnightBat. However, In DarkCat's origin it's only mentioned why she chose to be a hero. It's not enough. You need to make that specific part more definitive.

I hope I'm not being to pushy, just giving words of advice
Click to expand...

Does one need a reason to use their abilities? The inspiration for DarkCat, on my end at least, was Alexia from my story. You don't need a reason if heroism and kindness is part of your personality.
 
Chapter 9: In the Cave


ENT. The Knightcave

KnightBat sits at the massive super computer in the cave he found after the deaths of his parents, cowl off, becoming Bruce Masters again. His vivid green eyes are narrowed, taking in the information that is relayed throughout the screen. Lee, his butler, walks in.

Lee: What is it, sir?

Bruce: I'm reading the reports of the Jayne Memorial Hospital Explosion.

Lee: Didn't the police conclude it to be a gas leak?

Bruce: Yes. That's what they concluded. It's time for me to make my own conclusions. Do you know whose room blew up, so to speak?

Lee: No sir.

Bruce: Michael Gamas'. His body was missing after the smoke cleared.

Lee: Perhaps it was incinerated?

Bruce: That's what I thought at first...

Bruce types in a command.

Bruce: But then I read about the doctor with a hole in his stomach. If it was indeed a gas explosion, his body would be charred. A hole would not have appeared in it.

Lee: Do you have any ideas, then?

Bruce: Yes. I studied the air. They were traces of gamma-radiation in it.

Lee: And that means...?

Bruce: That there was no gas leak. Think about it. Gamas' machine harnessed gamma waves. When it blew up, he was standing right beside it. They had him listed under stable condition right before he disappeared.

Lee: Are you suggesting, Master Bruce, that Michael Gamas somehow gained Gamma powers, and used them to kill his doctor and escape?

Bruce: Pretty much, yeah.

Lee: Well, it's certainly one of your more sensible ideas.

Bruce smirks, then frowns.

Bruce: If I'm right, he's still out there, which means he's a threat.
Bruce stands up.

Lee: What will you do?

Bruce: Go back to Hype City. I'll talk to the others. We'll come up with a plan.

Lee: Would you be as so kind as to notify me if you're going to pursue him.

Bruce: Of course.

He takes the cowl and puts it on his head, reaffirming his oath to his parents, becoming the KnightBat once again.
 
This is awesome. Design my character as you wish. I'm gonna be keeping a watchful eye on this, so keep up the incredible work!
 
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