CryoftheBanshee
Civilian
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OK, enough is enough. Here are the Top 10 reasons Aquaman is a badass superhero (note: I am ignoring the recent DC reboot, because everyone should):
10) C'mon: he can talk to sea life. Moreover, he can make sea life do whatever he wants. He can make fish give up their lives at will for his food--dude doesn't even have to hunt. If he wanted to, he could have a pod of orca capsize a ship full of bad guys and a pod of dolphins to drag them all down into their dolphin rape caves (you read that right--that's a scientific fact). You don't stand a chance.
9) Sea life includes animals like sea birds. Which means he can get you with animals anywhere. Frigate birds and sea eagles and puffins are on your asses 24/7.
8) The ocean is everywhere. It's over 70% of the Earth, and it's filled with creatures we haven't even seen yet. Scary **** down there, guys.
7) You know what lives in the ocean? King Crabs. Those things will **** you up.
6) Aquaman isn't limited to the ocean. He can come up on land and kick your ass. He can only stay on land for a short amount of time, but let's face it: he doesn't need that long to beat the crap out of you. Especially not with all this next stuff.
5) He has super senses. He can see in complete darkness and hear to the point of having sonar. You wish you had sonar.
4) He can live in all parts of the ocean. Which means he's durable enough to withstand pretty much anything you can throw at him. Machine guns, anti-tank missiles, asteroids...**** it. He's been to the ocean floor.
3) He has super strength. Dude can throw a whale. Hell, he HAS thrown a whale, and he can throw it clear out of the ocean. Doesn't bother him, he's Aquaman. And I didn't even mention the fact that he can swim over thousands of miles in an hour (Yeah, you read that right. Not even making it up).
2) When Aquaman lost his hand, he replaced it with three different things: a cybernetic hook, a cybernetic hand, and finally a magical hand that has the ability to dehydrate anyone he touches. Dehydrate them to death. It can also change shape and fire jets of water at incredible speeds.
1) In the "Blackest Night" series, Aquaman was resurrected from the dead. Because of that, he gained the power to summon DEAD sea life along with all other sea life. Which means reanimating skeletons of marine dinosaurs or colossal squid or anything else terrifying and unimaginable. He's the HP Lovecraft of the ocean. And since we're talking fiction, you know what else lives in the ocean? Mother****ing Cthulhu, Dagon, and all the rest of those Lovecraftian monstrosities. Godzilla, too. Aquaman holds the world in the palm of his hand.
In short: Aquaman can kick your ass. He can kick the collective asses of half the Justice League. He doesn't even give a **** about you making fun of him, because he's chillin in the ocean.
10) C'mon: he can talk to sea life. Moreover, he can make sea life do whatever he wants. He can make fish give up their lives at will for his food--dude doesn't even have to hunt. If he wanted to, he could have a pod of orca capsize a ship full of bad guys and a pod of dolphins to drag them all down into their dolphin rape caves (you read that right--that's a scientific fact). You don't stand a chance.
9) Sea life includes animals like sea birds. Which means he can get you with animals anywhere. Frigate birds and sea eagles and puffins are on your asses 24/7.
8) The ocean is everywhere. It's over 70% of the Earth, and it's filled with creatures we haven't even seen yet. Scary **** down there, guys.
7) You know what lives in the ocean? King Crabs. Those things will **** you up.
6) Aquaman isn't limited to the ocean. He can come up on land and kick your ass. He can only stay on land for a short amount of time, but let's face it: he doesn't need that long to beat the crap out of you. Especially not with all this next stuff.
5) He has super senses. He can see in complete darkness and hear to the point of having sonar. You wish you had sonar.
4) He can live in all parts of the ocean. Which means he's durable enough to withstand pretty much anything you can throw at him. Machine guns, anti-tank missiles, asteroids...**** it. He's been to the ocean floor.
3) He has super strength. Dude can throw a whale. Hell, he HAS thrown a whale, and he can throw it clear out of the ocean. Doesn't bother him, he's Aquaman. And I didn't even mention the fact that he can swim over thousands of miles in an hour (Yeah, you read that right. Not even making it up).
2) When Aquaman lost his hand, he replaced it with three different things: a cybernetic hook, a cybernetic hand, and finally a magical hand that has the ability to dehydrate anyone he touches. Dehydrate them to death. It can also change shape and fire jets of water at incredible speeds.
1) In the "Blackest Night" series, Aquaman was resurrected from the dead. Because of that, he gained the power to summon DEAD sea life along with all other sea life. Which means reanimating skeletons of marine dinosaurs or colossal squid or anything else terrifying and unimaginable. He's the HP Lovecraft of the ocean. And since we're talking fiction, you know what else lives in the ocean? Mother****ing Cthulhu, Dagon, and all the rest of those Lovecraftian monstrosities. Godzilla, too. Aquaman holds the world in the palm of his hand.
In short: Aquaman can kick your ass. He can kick the collective asses of half the Justice League. He doesn't even give a **** about you making fun of him, because he's chillin in the ocean.
