Yeah the Jett thing is a tad weird, but I'm also assuming it was always the plan to age her up quickly. Kind of the opposite of the Richards' kids, a character who was meant to be an adult but they wanted to show some important formative years for her first. Idk, it is weird, but I guess I could see what he's going for.
Daken's bi, not homosexual, so I don't see an issue with that one. Uncanny X-Force was an utterly perfect comic run as far as I'm concerned.
And the Havok speech, I can see the issue people have with it, but I also saw where Remender was coming from on it. The speech was more about culture than race, and he was right in that mutants don't really have a culture of their own (outside of a superhero culture maybe) assimilating is a bigger issue for groups that have an actual, shared history that they can take pride in. Mutants can only really point to the actions of the X-men (which are largely secret) or the brotherhood (which are terrorist-y) as "mutant history", so they may just rather keep it quiet.
but as for the whole Falcon-Jett thing, it was a bit weird, and a tad cliched with the whole drunken hook-up thing, and didn't even necessarily work as a story beat, but it was far from the most offensive thing I've seen in even more recent comics.